Friends

Working from 9am-9pm today and I have a lot on my mind about work that I wanted to write. I have a lot on my mind in general but work seems to be triggering a lot of negative feelings right now that I'd like to sort out.

Maybe the weekend will give me time to rest up and think clearly on what I should do.

ETA: Nothing worth typing about any more. My boss was extremely cruel to me and I took it to heart. He does this shit to my coworkers though, apparently, so at least I'm not alone.

Still. It sucks to be put down and then told 'I'm doing it to make you stronger'. Yeah, abuse always grows you into a better person. ALWAYS. I wonder if this is how he treats his partner?

I have begun unlocking art and picture entries. I feel rather foolish for having gone into 'OMG LOCKDOWN' mode just because someone was trying to cause me grief. A person who doesn't want to be in my life anymore, even.

And while I've had an utterly awful month so far, I wanted to tell you that today was a good day. Because it was marginally better than any day I've had yet this month.

Scott bought me a rosemary Christmas tree. It smells amazing, and was even gift wrapped for the child in me that still enjoys tearing paper.

And then he gave me two books. He skipped work, spent all morning in a bookstore reading and researching them and brought them home for me.

Two books on learning to live with and cope with Borderline Personality Disorder.

Needless to say, I cried for a good few minutes. It's probably the most thoughtful and amazing gift anyone has given me in a very long time. A gift that could save my life, literally.

I don't think you can get more thoughtful than that.

Current Mood: rejuvenated
Current Music: VAST - Lost